Happy New Year! For many, the start of a new year holds the promise of fresh starts and new beginnings—a chance to hit the reset button, to get a do-over. Resolutions are sincerely made but seldom kept. Old patterns find their way back into our routines. The best of intentions get sidelined by the challenges and busyness of life. [...]
Sometimes marriage can be hard. Sometimes marriage can be painful. Sometimes that pain and hardship can lead you to entertain thoughts of escape—to distance yourself from your spouse (physically, mentally, and/or emotionally) and the hard work necessary to maintain a marriage of love, unity, and understanding. When I'm in this place, it's a red flag for me to [...]
As marriage mentors, Sharon and I have witnessed couples that had some pretty toxic patterns of communication. Their discussions were dominated by insults, accusations, put-downs, sarcasm, and contempt for each other. In fact, we would have to encourage them to find good things to say to each other. While that may be an extreme example, most of us—including Sharon and [...]
By Eva Marie Everson With one question I opened Pandora's Box. "What, if anything," I asked my husband, "could I change about me to make you happier?" It wasn't that we were unhappy or that I perceived he was unhappy. But after nearly 25 years together, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to realize that while we may adjust to [...]
By Sharon Peterson As women, we generally like to have a sense of control in our lives. The word "control", for many, carries with it a negative connotation. But some forms of control are good, like self-control. Everyone benefits from exercising self-control. Also, if you are a mom (or dad) of small children you need to exercise a certain amount [...]
A few days ago I was talking with someone about the importance of friendship with our spouse and remarked that I believed having a deep friendship with your spouse is at the core of a healthy and happy marriage. It made me think about this article from Doctors Leslie & Les Parrott. They have some good things to say about [...]
As Valentine's Day approaches once again, you can almost smell the panic in many husbands and boyfriends knowing that their wives or girlfriends are wanting—and in many cases—perhaps even expecting something special to happen that day. I have a certain disdain for these “Hallmark” holidays contrived to sell more greeting cards, chocolates, and flowers than you can imagine. They [...]
Thanksgiving is in the rear-view mirror, and we are already getting in the Christmas spririt. Every year we go cut down our Christmas tree the day after Thanksiving, stop at Cracker Barrel for lunch on the way home, then put up the decorations and trim the tree. Finally, we watch a classic Christmas movie together (hot chocolate optional). These are [...]
Parents, if you are looking for a way to strengthen your family, start by focusing on your spouse. Treating your spouse like royalty – and keeping them a priority among your many relationships – is an important and intentional choice that takes work. Yet, this is a most important work that will serve to keep your family healthy and stable. [...]
Good. Bad. Indifferent. Loving. Critical. Close. Distant. What comes to mind when you hear the word spouse? Think about it: every year on birthdays, anniversaries, and special holidays, we find ourselves sending out cards with cookie cut lyrics and rhythmic poetry to communicate to our spouses what that word means to us. Only one thing will be required of us [...]
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