One of the biggest myths of marriage is that a happy, healthy marriage is void of conflict. While some couples may have more conflicts than others due to personality types and family communication styles, the absence of conflict is an indication that you are actually shutting each other out emotionally and relationally. Its impossible to avoid conflict if you are [...]
Last month we talked about being a God-centered spouse instead of a spouse-centered spouse. We saw how our focus determined everything in our marriage relationship. Were we focused on God or our spouse? This month we are going to elaborate a bit more on that concept and see how a God-centered focus can lead to an enduring love for our [...]
When Sharon and I were married 25 years ago, there were only a fraction of the many marriage-related books that are available today. Whatever the issue is in your marriage, whether its communication, intimacy, conflict resolution, or one of a hundred others, there is a book to tell you how to solve your problem. We've read quite a few of [...]
Most of us entered marriage holding onto certain beliefs about what a christian marriage is supposed to be. Whatever those beliefs are—good or bad—determines how we function as a couple. Some of those beliefs might be based on false teaching, input from friends or family, T.V. and movies, or even our own misinterpretation of scripture. If you've gone through our [...]
It's that time of the year again. Whether we like it or not, Hallmark and a host of other stores turn our attention to the day when we celebrate and (try to) engage in romance. That's right, I'm talking about Valentine's Day. A day where women look forward to a romantic dinner by candlelight, intimate conversation, flowers and chocolate and [...]
I was never one to get caught up in the whole "New Years Resolutions" thing. If I needed to change something, it didn't seem to make sense to wait until New Years to finally make a commitment. You just do it when its needed. However, sometimes we need that extra motivation to take the steps we know are necessary to [...]
Thanksgiving is in the rear-view mirror, and we are already getting in the Christmas spririt. Every year we go cut down our Christmas tree the day after Thanksiving, stop at Cracker Barrel for lunch on the way home, then put up the decorations and trim the tree. Finally, we watch a classic Christmas movie together (hot chocolate optional). These are [...]
We're a bit late getting the newsletter out this month. We just moved into a new house, and for those that have moved before, especially after 25 years of accumulation, you know how stressful that can be. Throw in economic turmoil and physical challenges and it just adds to the mix. After months of trying to sell our townhome, we [...]
Have you ever wondered why some couples just seem to get along better than others? There are a variety of reasons why this happens and no two couples are exactly alike, but Dr. Gottman has found that Healthy Couples have a few things in common—Healthy Habits—that keep their relationship on-track. Its been said that when you get married you should [...]
“Can't we all just get along?” You've heard that phrase numerous times in the movies, in the news—maybe in your own home. This month we're talking about the “C-word”, and I don't mean commitment. Some regard Communication the most important dynamic in marriage. Good communication can enhance intimacy and perpetuate good will and positive feelings. It can minimize conflict, bring [...]
