There are few words in marriage more frightening than, “I’m done.” Sometimes those words mean, “I want a divorce.” But sometimes they mean something different: I’m done trying. I’m done initiating. I’m done hoping things will change. This kind of emotional withdrawal can be just as serious as a spouse walking out the door. A husband or wife may [...]
Marriage rarely falls apart all at once. More often, couples drift—one busy week, one neglected conversation, one missed prayer at a time. You can love God, love your spouse, attend church, and still discover that something is slowly leaking from your relationship. The good news is that protecting your marriage doesn't begin with trying harder. It begins with putting [...]
Marriage rarely falls apart all at once. More often, it happens quietly—one missed conversation, one ignored need, one distracted evening at a time. Selfishness may start relationship problems, but neglect can eventually kill a marriage. The good news is that neglect doesn't have to have the final word. With God's help, what has been neglected can be restored, strengthened, [...]
What if one of the most powerful things you could do to improve your marriage is something remarkably simple: stop talking and start listening? Many marriage conflicts begin with a desire to change our spouse. We want them to communicate differently, respond differently, be more patient, or understand us better. But lasting change often begins somewhere else—with us. A [...]
Marriage has a way of revealing parts of us we might prefer to keep hidden. Over time, our spouse's habits, preferences, weaknesses, and differences can become frustrating. We may begin thinking, If only my spouse would change, our marriage would be so much better. But what if we're asking the wrong question? Instead of constantly asking, “How can I [...]
Every married couple will fight. Not because marriage is broken, but because marriage brings two imperfect people together under one covenant. The real question isn't whether you and your spouse will experience conflict. The question is how you will fight when conflict comes. The Bible doesn't pretend marriage will always be easy. In fact, Scripture gives us remarkably practical [...]
When you hear the word "cherish", what do you think of? I think of the 1966 song "Cherish" by the band The Association. Yeah, I'm THAT old. The song starts out with these lyrics... Cherish is the word I use to describe All the feeling that I have hiding here for you inside When I hear the word cherish—almost [...]
This month we wrap up our discussion of Milan & Kay Yerkovich's book titled, "How We Love". It shows how crucial our early childhood experiences are and how they impact how we give and receive love even today as adults. Last month we looked at two of the four love styles that impair how we love others, especially our [...]
Milan & Kay Yerkovich, in their book titled, "How We Love", have identified four love styles that impair how we love others, especially our spouse. They are: The Avoider Style, The Pleaser Style, The Vacillator Style, and The Chaotic (Controller & Victim) Style. Last month we examined how crucial our early childhood experiences are and how they impact how [...]
Last month we started sharing excerpts and principles from Milan & Kay Yerkovich's book titled, "How We Love", which examines the connection between our childhood experiences and how we give and receive love as adults. We talked about why every marriage gets stuck sometimes and asked a pivotal question—"Can you recall being comforted as a child after a time [...]
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